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The Wine Illuminati?

5/1/2024

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Is the world run by a clandestine conclave of vainglorious vinophiles? A silly question, perhaps? One almost as foolish as flat earth theory, ancient astronauts, or the belief that college is a worthwhile investment? We may have thought so too until we went on a little post-Christmas trip to France and were confronted by this startling hypothesis.
 
Our tale began innocently enough. Doing our usual pre-trip research for a little holiday in France, we heard tell of a castle originally built in the 12th century called the Château du Clos de Vougeot. Interesting… Apparently, the Cistercian cellars and kitchens in the castle are original, too. Very interesting… We then learned that it was located smack dab in the middle of the Clos-Vougeot vineyard in the heart of Burgundy. Monsieur Château, you now have our attention… After budgeting out half of a day to visit this site, our focus then turned to other travel destinations.

Picture
The Château du Clos de Vougeot and its cobblestoned drive way and walls.
Fast forward a few months, and we’re driving up the long cobblestone road to the Château, passing acre upon acre of Burgundy vines silently waiting for the end of their winter slumber and a return to their awesome purpose of making world-class grapes. The area around the Château is very flat valley and affords wide views of the peaceful French countryside. Approaching the designated parking lot, we noticed uneven stone walls. As you know, these are the bane of every tourist with a rental car who didn’t go through the economic charade of purchasing the highest level of rental insurance. In these cases, you take your (economic) life in your hands. Regardless, after bravely parking and hoping for the best, we entered the Château. We then learned some very unusual facts, and not just about wine. 
Picture
The side of the Château leading to its legendary vineyards.
The Château is home to The Brotherhood of the Knights of Tastevin. This society, founded in 1934, is – at least on the surface – supposed to be focused on the development and maintenance of Burgundy wine and gastronomy. Strangely, the 12,000 or so members are not all living in the Château, or even in France. The oldest “commandery” of members is actually found in the United States. Odd, no?

A wee peek at the member list may raise even more eyebrows. Both Charles de Gaulle (of Paris airport fame) and Emmanuel Macron (current president of France and student of the famous philosopher Paul Ricoeur) were/are both members. You may say, “But they’re French, and you know how those people feel about wine. It’s not strange at all”. Well, what if we told you that Angela Merkel, Willy Brandt, and Helmut Kohl – all former German chancellors – were also members? What does Angela have to do with Burgundian gastronomy? I doubt the woman has even seen a snail in the wild, let alone eaten one stuffed with garlic, butter, and minced parsley. Oh, but it gets more interesting… American director Alfred Hitchcock, Canadian entrepreneur Kevin “Mr. Wonderful” O’Leary, and British politician Andrew Mitchell can be found on the brotherly Knights’ member lists.
Picture
This is where the Brotherhood’s meetings are held. Note the podium in an old wine barrel. One wonders about the goings on here after the Burgundy starts to flow…
This seems like quite a strange and diverse cavalcade of characters taken from the world stage. It raises interesting questions. What are they up to at meetings? Of course, they could just be innocently choosing to use time which could be spent making billions of euros and altering current world events to figure out whether Roquefort cheese is better paired with cabernet sauvignon or merlot. As you know, powerful people are well-known for their love of wasting time on frivolities which don’t directly benefit them. Or, is it possible that they’re up to other sorts of shenanigans? Now, we don’t want to recklessly cast conspiratorial aspersions, dear reader, but which option seems more probable to you? Are the “Knights” debating the best ways to prepare coq au vin, or are the futures of every man, woman, and child on this planet being shaped by powerful purple-red stained hands? We can't say for sure, but can only ask the questions. May Bacchus protect us from any listening devices that may have been secretly implanted in the bottle of Beaujolais we stowed in our luggage... 
Picture
What the Château’s old kitchen would have looked like during the medieval period.
Getting there
Château du Clos de Vougeot is a solid three-and-a-half-hour Southeast drive from Charles de Gaulle airport or a mere 21-minute drive from Aéroport de Dijon-Bourgogne. The Château has a very good website with all you need to know about getting there, fees (i.e., 9 euros for entrance), scheduled events etc. The staff at the Château were uniformly helpful and friendly. It was a fun and enjoyable visit even if we didn’t chance upon any evidence of human sacrifice, adrenochrome, reptilian shapeshifters, or other conspiratorial stuff.
 
https://www.closdevougeot.fr/
 
Tips
The Château is a popular place and will get bus tours, so do your best to visit during off-peak hours or during weekdays. Make sure to watch the movie offered at the site, too.

Side Trips
There is so much good tourism around this site that you would have no problems spending a couple of weeks in the area. Dijon and Dole are within striking distance of the Château and good wineries are dotted along the countryside. If you have a bit more time, we highly recommend you find a place to try a unique local specialty: vin jaune (i.e., yellow wine). The only places legally allowed to make this world-class product are found just an hour and thirty minutes’ drive northwest of the Château. We will cover vin jaune in a future post, so please check back. 
Picture
The Château’s lovingly cared for vineyards.
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